ACE

The first meeting was way back, months after that horrible experience. By some miracle, I still want to fuck and I have faith that I'll have a good fuck. I'm glad I'm an optimist.

I met Ace in an app few minutes before my shift ended. I think I initiated the conversation, after a poke from him. We agreed to meet a few days from then. I remember telling him, for some unknown reasons why... probably instincts, of my awful experience with butt fucking. He reassured me I'll be fine.

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I figured out which buses to take (a route I've memorized), and I passed by a house that's being built while doing uphill to his apartment building. Over the years, that skeleton would be a full fledged beautiful house with a large parking space.

I made it to the street of the building and we met outside, he looks like a regular 50 year old white guy (we're thirty years apart to the dot). Nothing spectacular or anything. He lead me inside and we talked a little, about the bus ride. I was in combination nervous, anxious, and downright scared. Later on, I'd recognize the cocktail of feelings I wrestled with as a "who-do-you-think-you-are-having-sex?". A combination of surprise and shame that questions the fact that I, of all people, can have sex and be sexy?!

I drank a glass of water, and after 15 seconds in the sofa we got to the bedroom ("Should we move to the bedroom?"). He was really gentle at maneuvering me to his bed (that he shares with his ex/roommate) and I needed it at that time. I got too eager though.

He stopped me in my kiss and said something like, "It's okay, slow down. No need to rush." Right after that something in me clicked and I calmed down so he could take the lead.

One of the things I enjoyed doing with him, was that he'll straddle me and close my legs together. Then he'll lift my balls and put a large wad of spit in the crevice. Then he'll fuck my taint. It feels amazing in between there, and I'll meet his thrusts. Sometimes, he'd hit it so right, I'd shudder.

I have no idea how long we fucked, but it was a great experience. I remember doing it doggy style and my hands were gripping the headboard. I remember it as a sort of validation that sex feels awesome; that sex is good. Later I realized that it was better because there was trust and mutual love and respect involved. At that moment, I was just meeting his thrusts.

We went to spooning. "Can I cum inside?" He was thrusting in and out of me, and I'm in some kind of pleasurable space.

"Yeah." A whisper enough for him to hear. I was unsure of this answer, but I'd say the same thing if I came back in time.

This was my first official bareback fucking experience (that got completed). The pleasure was intense as his cum expanded in my innards. Oh man, I can still feel ghosts  of it when i recall it.

After I came from jacking off, I froze from pleasure. The ceiling has a soft glow, my hand suspended in mid air, cum dripping off. I didn't think of anything other than the moment. He wipes me off and offers the shower, he has some nice sea saltwater soap. I love that scent because it's his too.

After cleanup, we talked for a little while. It'll take months to really be at ease with him, but I'd say we hit it great initially. The first strings of conversation involves a hint from him, that basically frames our relationship from then on (a complaint about overzealous sexual partners who cant distinguish between sex and a relationship proposal). Fuck Buddies. Nothing bad in that; "yeah, you're right," I agreed.

Then he'd talk about realizing his past life.

I was more materialistic back then, scrunched up my face.

He laughed at my response.

I laughed too.

I wish he was my first of firsts.

But I'm just very glad that we met.